THE ELDER SCROLLS V: SKYRIM
BETHESDA SOFTWORKS (XBOX 360, PS3, PC)
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Abandon all hope of a social life, all ye who enter the world of Skyrim. This is like some time-sucking mytho log ical monster, with more than 150 dungeons to spelunk, a sprawling realm to explore—even 300 books to read. Your custom avatar can wander wherever you wish while taking on mini quests to build magical and martial abilities. Just keep an eye on the skies—thar be dragons. Slaying one is a slog, but worth the effort: Vanquished dragons grant throaty spells that rival the vocal might of Ronnie James Dio. No detail was spared in the creation of this world. Bats flutter in caves, blood gushes from foes, moss sprouts from rocks at your feet, fog shrouds distant snowcapped peaks that you can climb if you make the trek. Maybe all that exploration sounds daunting, but Skyrim goes easy on roleplaying neophytes. You can organize your favorite abilities and weapons for easy access, while a spell shows you where to go next. You’ll still get lost in the massive world, but that’s part of the fun in a game this immersive.

NBA 2K12
2K SPORTS (XBOX 360, PS3, PS2, Wii, PC, PSP)
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Basketball fans with a case of the lockout blues will find their happy place in NBA 2K12. This virtual shrine to the sport takes 15 b-ball legends—including Larry Bird, Magic Johnson, and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar—and drops them into classic team matchups from the heights of their careers. The presentation shifts to reflect the era (Wilt Chamberlain’s 1971 Lakers vs. Knicks game appears in grainy VHS-quality color), while the athletes are rendered in period-accurate detail, right down to their old-school Converse court-stompers. Win each legend’s classic game and you’ll unlock his teammates for exhibition games against modern teams, finally putting an end to ages of what-if speculation.

ACE COMBAT: ASSAULT HORIZON
NAMCO BANDAI GAMES (XBOX 360, PS3)
Rating: 4 out of 4 stars

This game gives you tickets to the air show, strapping you into the cockpits (and gunner’s seats) of nearly every aircraft in the U.S. arsenal circa 2015, from stealth bombers to helicopter gunships. Don’t enlist if you’re expecting stick-and-rudder realism, though—the game’s aircraft turn and burn via arcade-style controls, complete with a thrilling dogfight mode that is triggered when you soar within gun range of a foe. Despite a globe-trotting plot written by a best-selling author (Jim DeFelice), Assault Horizon’s vibe feels more like an homage to Maverick and Goose, with lockon alarms and radio chatter that sound like they’re right out of Top Gun. No other air-combat game can match the Mach 5 pace here, even if a few missions bombard you with repetitive objectives.

ROCKSMITH
UBISOFT (XBOX 360, PS3, PC)
Rating: 4 out of 4 stars

Rocksmith is the next logical step in a genre that started with plastic instruments, turning you into a real guitar hero by teaching you to play an actual ax. A cable packed with the game connects any electric guitar to your console, turning your HDTV into an amp. Anyone who’s faux-rocked the Guitar Hero or Rock Band games will recognize the scrolling-note interface, which shows you where to put your fingers as you strum along to dozens of hits (artists range from Nirvana to Eric Clapton). An adaptive difficulty means you’re not forced to pretzel your fingers with power chords until you’re ready. Mini games, instructional videos, and technique challenges help you master the minutiae of six-string supremacy. The presentation is bare-bones, and the interface could do a better job showing finger placement, but you’ll forgive these shortcomings the first time Rocksmith lands you a groupie.

THQ (XBOX 360, PS3, PC)
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Saints Row: The Third is the latest and most lavish installment in the lewd saga that put the fun back into the open-world game formula. You play the capo of an infamous gang bent on defending a criminal empire in the seedy city of Steelport. The toys, tools, weapons, and vehicles used to accomplish your mission quickly escalate in absurdity. You’ll wield a dildo-shaped baseball bat, fight alongside a buck-naked partner with pixelated privates, flee from foes in a chariot pulled by an auto-tuned S&M freak—and that’s all within the first hour!

Silliness aside, Saints Row takes its gameplay seriously. A beefed-up combat system turns nut-shots into an art form, and enhanced vehicle physics make it easy to perform sideshow spinouts and aircraft acrobatics. With a seemingly never-ending supply of missions, character-upgrade options, oddball vehicles, and downloadable content (including Penthouse-related DLC that at press time we can only hint at), you’ll never get bored in Steelport—especially when you invite a friend and double your fun.

The holiday season brings a bounty of blockbuster games that you simply must play right now! Titles that were hot two months ago, meanwhile, wind up behind the couch buried under lost Netflix DVDs. Or, you can revitalize your favorite old games with downloadable content that won’t break the bank.

DEUS EX: HUMAN REVOLUTION: THE MISSING LINK
(XBOX 360, PS3, PC) $12.50
Everything faded to black for gadget-enhanced hero Adam Jensen at a particular point in Deus Ex: Human Revolution, leaving players to ponder what they had missed. This appropriately named expansion fills that gap, delivering roughly five hours of gameplay that stays true to the series’ anything-goes formula, and letting players experiment with different approaches to completing missions. Jensen will traverse all-new cyberpunkedout environments and encounter characters not in the main game. In fact, playing through Human Revolution isn’t crucial to understanding the storyline in The Missing Link.

INFAMOUS 2: FESTIVAL OF BLOOD
(PS3) $15
This stand-alone scenario for the openworld superhero adventure inFAMOUS 2 poses a question right out of a Twilight fangirl’s Trapper Keeper: What if megawattwielding protagonist Cole MacGrath were bitten by a vampire? With his soul on the line, MacGrath has just one night to find and kill the boss bloodsucker, who’s hiding somewhere in the city of New Marais. Hordes of lesser vampires prowl gothic streets and roof tops, giving our undead hero lots of opportunities to test electrifying new powers.

CALL OF DUTY: BLACK OPS REZURRECTION
(XBOX 360, PS3, PC) $12.50
Leave it to a zombie outbreak to breathe new life into the year-old first-person shooter. This zanily spelled map pack replaces Black Ops’ serious Cold War story with a mission to a Moon base that’s been overrun by the recently deceased. Blast zombies in lunar gravity with experimental weaponry that has explosive—and often hilarious—results in the vacuum of space. Along with the new Moon setting, Rezurrection also includes four zombie-themed maps from previous Black Ops’ expansions.

PORTAL 2 DLC PACK 1
(XBOX 360, PS3, PC) FREE
Just when you thought it was safe to slip into the vegetative state encouraged by most games, developer Valve has unleashed an expansion pack for its brain-straining master piece. The downloadable content includes new topsy-turvy test chambers that—like those in the main game—you can escape only by thinking outside the three dimensional box. Other extras include leader boards and solo/multiplayer challenge modes, making this an unbelievable value for its price. Oh, did we mention it’s free?

Gears of War 3
Microsoft (Xbox 360)
The good guy: Marcus Fenix, beefy leader of Delta Squad, along with new playable compatriots.
The bad guys: The Lambent, a mutant scourge that’s infecting the planet Sera from the inside out.
The gear: Armored “Silverback” mechanized suits; a retro assault rifle topped by a gut-ripping bayonet.
The gist: As if the Locust Horde inhabitants of planet Sera weren’t menacing enough, a new mutation called the Lambent is threatening the few surviving pockets of humanity. It’s up to you—and three friends in the enhanced cooperative mode—to exterminate the scourge in this final installment of the revolutionary shooter trilogy. A nearly limitless suite of online multiplayer modes (including men against monsters) will keep you blasting long after you save the world in the main campaign.

Battlefield 3
EA (Xbox 360, PS3, PC)
The good guy: Staff Sergeant Henry “Black” Blackburn.
The bad guys: An insurgency group known as the PLR.
The gear: Every modern gun under the sun; military vehicles/aircraft.
The gist: Players fight a globetrotting insurgency—not to mention one another in 24-man multiplayer matches—but the real opponent is Modern Warfare 3. Tired of playing underdog, Battlefield 3’s developers have unleashed their biggest gun of all: a spectacular-looking new game engine that allows for destructible environments. Walls splinter under gunfire, building facades shatter from tank rounds, and safe cover doesn’t stay safe for long. Authentic-sounding radio chatter and desperate cries from com rades keep you focused as bullets and RPG rounds rock the world around you.

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3
Activision (Xbox 360, PS3, PC)
The good guys: American and British Special Forces operators.
The bad guys: Russian troops keen on conquering the U.S. of A.
The gear: An overwhelming arsenal of weapons, from the standard M4 assault rifle to the exotic XM25 Airburst grenade launcher.
The gist: Russki troops take a bite out of the Big Apple at the beginning of MW3, and it’s up to the player to bite back and repel the invasion that began in the last game. Despite some highly publicized changes in studio management, this hugely anticipated sequel manages to ramp up the series’ trademark Jerry Bruckheimer inspired action. Expect firefights atop skyscrapers, helicopter gunship battles, and didn’t-see-that-coming plot twists in a cinematic yarn that spans two continents. Multiplayer, meanwhile, has been upgraded with new co-op modes for players who want to earn experience points without having to deal with the trash-talking, unwashed masses of public matches.

Rage
Bethesda Softworks (Xbox 360, PS3, PC)
The good guy: The lone survivor of a near-future Armageddon.
The bad guys: The Authority, a Big Brother–like regime.
The gear: Boomerang blades, one-man turrets, sentry bots, and remote-controlled exploding cars.
The gist: This apocalyptic first person blaster from the genre’s progenitors, id Software, intermingles on-foot combat with vehicular manslaughter in dune buggies bristling with customizable weaponry. An asteroid collision has transformed Earth into a wasteland ruled by mutants, bandit bikers, and a totalitarian government. You have to strap into your buggy and explore the sprawling no-man’s-land between towns and other points of interest in a quest to save what’s left of humanity.

2011 Penthouse Holiday Gaming Survival Guide, Also See:

Just Dance 3
Ubisoft (Xbox 360, PS3, Wii)
The good guy: You, for buying this game for your lady.
The bad guys: Uncouth dudes who sit on the sidelines just to ogle your girlfriend.
The gear: The Kinect is required equipment for the Xbox 360 version; on PS3, each player needs a Move controller.
The gist: Chicks love to dance. Chicks love guys who can dance. This game teaches guys how to get down with chicks. Those three simple facts of life sum up the appeal of this four-player dance party. Its track list has Top 40 songs from every musical genre, including hiphop, disco, rock, R&B—even country. Rhythmically challenged players can tone down the difficulty and sing along for bonus points.

Rayman Origins
Ubisoft (Xbox 360, PS3, Wii)
The good guy: Rayman, Mario’s French equivalent.
The bad guys: Nightmare-spawning Darktoons.
The gear: Telescoping fists and pompadour-powered flight.
The gist: This is a throwback to the days when game worlds were two-dimensional and game heroes were built from dozens of sprites instead of thousands of polygons. The limbless hero—and up to three other players—go through 60 levels of good old-fashioned hop-and bop gameplay. Your lady friend will love the oil-painting environments, adorable enemies, and silly storyline (it’s just so … French). You’ll look like a hero when you summon old-school skills to help her topple the trippy end-of-level bosses.

Ratchet & Clank: All 4 One
Sony (PS3)
The good guys: Fur-ball alien Ratchet, his robo-companion Clank, and musclehead superhero Qwark.
The bad guy: Dr. Nefarious, forced to team up with the heroes as a playable character.
The gear: The Sheepinator, the Pyro Blaster, the Morph-O-Ray, and dozens of other silly guns.
The gist: Four players take on goofball foes while wielding the wackiest weaponry in videogame history. “Use weapons together to unleash devastating co-op pwnage,” says Shaun McCabe, production director at Insomniac Games, “or compete with your teammates to build up your weapon arsenal.” Take our advice: Let your girlfriend get the good stuff.

2011 Penthouse Holiday Gaming Survival Guide, Also See:

Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception
Sony (PS3)
The good guy: Nathan Drake, glory-hound descendant of Sir Francis Drake.
The bad guy: The ruthless leader of a shadowy cult.
The gear: Rifles and pistols/thousands of customizable variations.
The gist: A routine treasure hunt turns into archaeo logical pay dirt for the redoubtable Mr. Drake, who winds up investigating the mystery of a lost city. He battles cultists in a run-down French château, and chases desert mirages that almost make the PS3’s graphics chip belch smoke. Once the cinematic story is said and done, players will find hours of thrills in extensive multiplayer modes that retain the movielike quality of the single-player campaign.

The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword
Nintendo (Wii)
The good guy: Sword-wielding elfin hero Link.
The bad guys: Habitual evildoer Ganondorf.
The gear: Master Sword, bow,
bombs, grappling hook, slingshot—typical tools of adventure.
The gist: This epic unleashes its ageless elf hero on a new continent full of far-flung dungeons reach able via flight atop a giant bird. The whimsical fairy tale does have one cutting-edge feature that adds an element of manliness: realistic sword-fighting (MotionPlus accessory required). The swordplay adds swashbuckling fun to enemy encounters—although your Madden playing pals might give you a wedgie while you’re playing.

Assassin’s Creed: Revelations
Ubisoft (Xbox 360, PS3, PC)
The good guy: Ezio Auditore, scowling, cowl-wearing master assassin.
The bad guys: The Knights Templar, history’s super-duper-secret club of troublemakers.
The gear: The spring-loaded hookblade; new bomb-making materials.
The gist: The silent-but-violent Ezio goes on a sixteenth-century killing spree, stalking Templar bigwigs on narrow streets seething with sweaty humanity during the Third Crusade. His journey to track down five ancient seals of the assassins’ brotherhood takes him to Constantinople, the Ottoman Empire melting pot. Like a Renaissance-era For rest Gump, he bumps into various real life characters. Whether he rewrites history is up to you.

Batman: Arkham City
Warner Bros. Interactive (Xbox 360, PS3, PC)
The good guy: The Dark Knight.
The bad guys: The Joker, the Riddler, Two-Face, and Catwoman (playable in her own heist missions).
The gear: A visor-mounted CSI lab, plus the usual utility-belt toys.
The gist: The mayor has turned a vast chunk of Gotham City into a sprawling super prison. Naturally, the criminal mas ter minds locked inside plot their escape and world domination, giving Batman more excuses to work out childhood trauma with his fists while uncover ing the prisoners’ plans with his gadgets. The first game’s famously fluid combat has been upgraded with twice the number of attacks, counters, and takedowns. Catwoman’s lithe acrobatics will overstress your analog stick.

2011 Penthouse Holiday Gaming Survival Guide, Also See:

The Lord of the Rings: War in the North
Warner Bros. Interactive (Xbox 360, PS3, PC)
The good guys: A fellowship of three Middle-earthlings: human, elf, and dwarf.
The bad guy: Evil-eye Sauron and his army of Orcs and trolls.
The gear: Swords, shields, axes, bows…. You know, loot!
The gist: Forget all the fuzzy feet and dwarf-tossing comic relief of The Lord of the Rings films; this combat-heavy roleplaying adventure embraces the serious side of J.R.R. Tolkien’s Middle-earth. “The fighting is hard-hitting and brutal,” says Michael de Plater, design director at Snowblind Studios, “with blood spurting and severed limbs flying.” Up to three players journey through Middle-earth’s war-torn northern regions—uncharted territory for Tolkien fans—on a Gandalf-approved quest to murder Sauron’s minions. When the battles become overwhelming, the fellowship can summon air support from an eagle sidekick. Wield him wisely or his goose is cooked.

Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Bethesda Softworks (Xbox 360, PS3, PC)
The good guy: A magic-wielding warrior seemingly ripped from a Molly Hatchet album cover.
The bad guys: Swarms of dragons.
The gear: Enough medieval weaponry to arm a realm of Renaissance Faire regulars.
The gist: “It’s just a big, crazy roleplaying game with as much stuff in it as possible,” says Todd Howard, Skyrim’s director. It’s hard to imagine more “stuff” than in Bethesda’s Elder Scrolls and Fall out epics, but even a quick look will make your helm spin. See a snow capped peak? Climb it. Find a hole in the ground? Spelunk it. Those mastodons stomping across the plains? Kill ’em and grill ’em to gird your loins. Rend heaven and Earth with throaty Dragon Shout spells when winged wyverns attack. Molly Hatchet would approve.

Torchlight II
Runic Games (PC, Mac)
The good guys: A ragtag party of warriors and magic users … and their pets.
The bad guy: A mysterious villain who picks up where the first game’s ancient evil dropped the ball.
The gear: Various rare weapons, amulets, and pieces of armor.
The gist: While fans of multiplayer dungeon crawlers await Diablo III—the one sequel to rule them all—they can feed their loot-collecting needs with this. The action roleplaying epic, available for direct download at a less-than-epic price, looks and plays just like the Diablo games (it oughta—Torchlight II is the product of ex-Diablo developers). Players team up and travel the world, raiding dungeons and click-click-clicking on monsters to hack them to bits. Pet sidekicks offer backup and, more important, moral support.

2011 Penthouse Holiday Gaming Survival Guide, Also See:

FIFA Soccer 12
EA Sports (Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, PSP, 3DS)
The good guy: Anyone who wants to kick some balls.
The bad guys: CPU opponents with enhanced artificial intelligence, able to read your teammates’ strengths and weaknesses.
The gear: Official uniforms and equipment for more than 500 teams.
The gist: If you think the rough tackles in Madden NFL are wince-worthy, wait till you see players collide in FIFA 12. A new physics engine—two years in development—adds bone-crunching authenticity to this flagship soccer series. True physics govern every tussle, ensuring that battles for ball possession always have believable (rather than arbitrary) outcomes. Defenders now behave more cautiously, and even the dribbling system has been given an overhaul. You get a light touch in tight spaces and more time behind the ball to choose among passing, charging, or striking.

NBA 2K12
2K Sports (Xbox 360, PS3, PS2, Wii, PC, PSP)
The good guys: Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, or [insert your own court hero here].
The bad guys: Online opponents with unstoppable monsters from the player-creation system (a cheat the developers say they’re fixing).
The gear: The PlayStation Move controller adds point-and-shoot playability to the PS3 version.
The gist: The follow-up to the finest basketball simulator ever created. The player models, stadium crowds, and overall presentation have been enhanced almost to the point of as-seen-on-TV fidelity. Support for the PlayStation Move controller lets less-hard-core players work the court while leaving one hand free for beer and chips.

Forza Motorsport 4
Microsoft (Xbox 360)
The good guy: You, the speed freak.
The bad guys: Hotshot human challengers in online racing modes.
The gear: Hundreds of erotic cars from more than 80 makers.
The gist: Racing isn’t your entire reason for existence in Forza 4, which encourages players to collaborate. Drivers can form car clubs with fellow gear heads and artists from the Forza community to turn out finely tuned autos emblazoned with dazzling custom designs. Plug in the Kinect motion sensor to stroll around a virtual garage of your creations, and bend down to peer under the hoods. The game really kicks into high gear once the show hits the road. Cars and courses are rendered with unparalleled detail at a superbly smooth 60 frames per second.

2011 Penthouse Holiday Gaming Survival Guide, Also See: