You don’t have to be a Casanova to charm your special lady. You just need to master a few basic skills.
- By Jennifer Matlack
This baker’s dozen of Valentine’s tips are romantic gestures that every guy should know how to execute successfully. While there’s no guarantee that they’ll get you in her pants, they’ll definitely plant the thought in her mind. Good luck Romeo.
OPEN A BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE
There’s a theory that guys who let the cork pop prematurely are prone to letting themselves pop too early, if you know what we mean. The trick to opening a bottle of bubbly without incident is to remove the foil, then, with one hand covering the cork, ease off the wire closure. Gradually release pressure on the cork by gently rocking it back and forth. When it’s almost out, the gas will escape with just a little hiss or a light puff. Remember—it’s all about finesse.
There’s a theory that guys who let the cork pop prematurely are prone to letting themselves pop too early, if you know what we mean. The trick to opening a bottle of bubbly without incident is to remove the foil, then, with one hand covering the cork, ease off the wire closure. Gradually release pressure on the cork by gently rocking it back and forth. When it’s almost out, the gas will escape with just a little hiss or a light puff. Remember—it’s all about finesse.
SURPRISE HER WITH FLOWERS
If you show up with a bunch of carnations, odds are she’ll think you just raided a fresh grave. That said, a pricey bouquet isn’t mandatory. Try to be resourceful. Depending on the climate, spend five minutes picking some roadside wildflowers, or clipping a few branches from a blossoming fruit tree. If you live where the dead of winter means there’s no natural flora in sight, you can hit the supermarket for a cluster of bright blooms—just remember to ditch the plastic wrap before giving them to her. Convinced she wants roses delivered? Then send only 11—not 12—because, well, she’s a rare flower, too.
If you show up with a bunch of carnations, odds are she’ll think you just raided a fresh grave. That said, a pricey bouquet isn’t mandatory. Try to be resourceful. Depending on the climate, spend five minutes picking some roadside wildflowers, or clipping a few branches from a blossoming fruit tree. If you live where the dead of winter means there’s no natural flora in sight, you can hit the supermarket for a cluster of bright blooms—just remember to ditch the plastic wrap before giving them to her. Convinced she wants roses delivered? Then send only 11—not 12—because, well, she’s a rare flower, too.
GIVE A GOOD MASSAGE
Massage is all about relaxing the person you’re kneading. With that in mind, don’t suggest that she undress and lie spread-eagle on your bed. First, ask her where she wants to be touched. She’ll probably say her shoulders, back, or feet—not her ass. Once she names the place, warm your hands by vigorously rubbing them together. Then squeeze some massage or mineral oil on her skin. Keep her calm and comfortable by using only gentle rhythmic movements—no intense pressure—especially near the spine. Pay attention to whether she’s moaning with pleasure or wincing in pain, and lighten up if she needs it.
Massage is all about relaxing the person you’re kneading. With that in mind, don’t suggest that she undress and lie spread-eagle on your bed. First, ask her where she wants to be touched. She’ll probably say her shoulders, back, or feet—not her ass. Once she names the place, warm your hands by vigorously rubbing them together. Then squeeze some massage or mineral oil on her skin. Keep her calm and comfortable by using only gentle rhythmic movements—no intense pressure—especially near the spine. Pay attention to whether she’s moaning with pleasure or wincing in pain, and lighten up if she needs it.
USE CANDLES TO CREATE A ROMANTIC ATMOSPHERE
Candlelight imparts romance and provides a flattering glow—pimples and errant whiskers disappear. But the trick is to not overdo it. Too many flickering tapers can call to mind a séance or Black Mass. Get the right light by clustering three candles of varying heights at two or three different locations in the room. Keep in mind you’re trying to create a mood—not an inferno. The intensity will be enough for you to see what you’re doing, but not so much that she’ll fear for her life. And don’t go overboard on scented candles. One, if any, is plenty.
Candlelight imparts romance and provides a flattering glow—pimples and errant whiskers disappear. But the trick is to not overdo it. Too many flickering tapers can call to mind a séance or Black Mass. Get the right light by clustering three candles of varying heights at two or three different locations in the room. Keep in mind you’re trying to create a mood—not an inferno. The intensity will be enough for you to see what you’re doing, but not so much that she’ll fear for her life. And don’t go overboard on scented candles. One, if any, is plenty.
PURCHASE FIRST-CLASS CHOCOLATE
The thing about chocolate is that it has to be high-quality. That means no Whitman’s Samplers from the drugstore. Go for the sexy stuff: chocolates flavored with chilies, sea salt, or raspberries. Fail-safe brands include Ghirardelli (ghirardelli.com), Godiva (godiva.com), and Teuscher (teuscher.com). If she’s a brownie kind of girl, whip up a batch yourself—you can find Ghirardelli brownie mix in most supermarkets—or show up with a box of decadent confections from Fairytale Brownies (brownies.com). You’ll be her Prince Charming.
The thing about chocolate is that it has to be high-quality. That means no Whitman’s Samplers from the drugstore. Go for the sexy stuff: chocolates flavored with chilies, sea salt, or raspberries. Fail-safe brands include Ghirardelli (ghirardelli.com), Godiva (godiva.com), and Teuscher (teuscher.com). If she’s a brownie kind of girl, whip up a batch yourself—you can find Ghirardelli brownie mix in most supermarkets—or show up with a box of decadent confections from Fairytale Brownies (brownies.com). You’ll be her Prince Charming.
BRUSH HER HAIR
Hair brushing can be an awfully sensual experience. With her sitting in front of you, run your fingers lightly through her hair. Work out knots by separating them with your fingertips. Then, using a natural-bristle brush (which doesn’t pull or snag hair), brush gently from top to bottom in slow, even strokes. This should go without saying, but if it’s one of your first dates, don’t offer to groom her. “It’ll creep her out, especially if you carry a brush with you, because that’ll translate into a fetish,” says Marty Savarick, a relationship expert and author of 101 Ways to Stop Hating Dating.
Hair brushing can be an awfully sensual experience. With her sitting in front of you, run your fingers lightly through her hair. Work out knots by separating them with your fingertips. Then, using a natural-bristle brush (which doesn’t pull or snag hair), brush gently from top to bottom in slow, even strokes. This should go without saying, but if it’s one of your first dates, don’t offer to groom her. “It’ll creep her out, especially if you carry a brush with you, because that’ll translate into a fetish,” says Marty Savarick, a relationship expert and author of 101 Ways to Stop Hating Dating.
WRITE THE PERFECT LOVE NOTE
No texting. No e-mailing. The operative word here is write. You know—with a pen. Don’t worry, it’s easier than it sounds. Dear ____ (use her first name or a term of endearment). Then tell her one thing you love about her—her kindness, her crass sense of humor, the way she gives head (just kidding about that last one). In the next sentence, explain what she’s added to your life. For example, maybe you laugh more now or you feel more confident. Whatever it is, tell her, but keep it short and sweet. As an added touch, overnight the note to her. It’ll show the urgency and sincerity of your sentiments.
No texting. No e-mailing. The operative word here is write. You know—with a pen. Don’t worry, it’s easier than it sounds. Dear ____ (use her first name or a term of endearment). Then tell her one thing you love about her—her kindness, her crass sense of humor, the way she gives head (just kidding about that last one). In the next sentence, explain what she’s added to your life. For example, maybe you laugh more now or you feel more confident. Whatever it is, tell her, but keep it short and sweet. As an added touch, overnight the note to her. It’ll show the urgency and sincerity of your sentiments.
SLOW DANCE WITH HER
Slow dancing can make you feel like an idiot, but it doesn’t have to. What helps is music that can drown out the voices in your head. You know, Man, I must look like such an asshole right now. Instead, move your body to the rhythm of the song. You don’t even have to move across the floor. Just stand there, with your arms around her, rocking back and forth to whatever “oh, baby” tune is playing. The song will be over before you know it, and she’ll be nicely primed to get horizontal.
Slow dancing can make you feel like an idiot, but it doesn’t have to. What helps is music that can drown out the voices in your head. You know, Man, I must look like such an asshole right now. Instead, move your body to the rhythm of the song. You don’t even have to move across the floor. Just stand there, with your arms around her, rocking back and forth to whatever “oh, baby” tune is playing. The song will be over before you know it, and she’ll be nicely primed to get horizontal.
RUN A BATH FOR HER
Soaking in the tub is a ritual for a lot of women. To create the perfect bath experience for your partner, set the water just shy of hot. While the tub fills, add oils, salts, rose petals, or bubble bath. Light a candle, dim the lights, and close the door behind you, so the heat in the bathroom doesn’t escape. She’ll know what to do from there.
Soaking in the tub is a ritual for a lot of women. To create the perfect bath experience for your partner, set the water just shy of hot. While the tub fills, add oils, salts, rose petals, or bubble bath. Light a candle, dim the lights, and close the door behind you, so the heat in the bathroom doesn’t escape. She’ll know what to do from there.
PAY HER A SINCERE COMPLIMENT
The comments that will resonate the most are about more than how she looks—not that every woman doesn’t love to hear that she turns you on. You should also praise her for something. For example, she’s putting herself through college, kicks ass at her job, or plays poker like a pro. Accolades like these show that you value her for who she is, not just how hot she looks.
The comments that will resonate the most are about more than how she looks—not that every woman doesn’t love to hear that she turns you on. You should also praise her for something. For example, she’s putting herself through college, kicks ass at her job, or plays poker like a pro. Accolades like these show that you value her for who she is, not just how hot she looks.
GIVE HER A KISS THAT CURLS HER TOES
Mind your tongue. You don’t want her to mistake you for a slurping golden retriever pup. Instead, focus on her lips. According to Savarick, you should start out slow with some soft kisses and hold or caress her face. Pull away during the kiss and look into her eyes.
Mind your tongue. You don’t want her to mistake you for a slurping golden retriever pup. Instead, focus on her lips. According to Savarick, you should start out slow with some soft kisses and hold or caress her face. Pull away during the kiss and look into her eyes.
SAY “I LOVE YOU” IN THREE LANGUAGES
It’s a small feat, but she’ll be impressed, and besides, women love accents. In French, the language of love, those three magic words are Je t’aime. In Italian, it’s Ti amo. To say it in American Sign Language, extend your pinky and pointer fingers like you’re at a death-metal concert, then outstretch your thumb.
It’s a small feat, but she’ll be impressed, and besides, women love accents. In French, the language of love, those three magic words are Je t’aime. In Italian, it’s Ti amo. To say it in American Sign Language, extend your pinky and pointer fingers like you’re at a death-metal concert, then outstretch your thumb.
SET THE TABLE LIKE A MAN
Paper or plastic? Neither! Even if the only meal you’re capable of serving is takeout, break out the breakable dishes. Depending on what you’re having, you’ll need a dinner plate for the main course and a smaller plate or shallow bowl for the appetizer or salad. Make sure you include a water glass and wine glass. Don’t get carried away with the silverware. Just one spoon, one fork, and a knife, if necessary, will do. Top it all off with a cloth napkin. It’s loads classier than a folded paper towel.
Paper or plastic? Neither! Even if the only meal you’re capable of serving is takeout, break out the breakable dishes. Depending on what you’re having, you’ll need a dinner plate for the main course and a smaller plate or shallow bowl for the appetizer or salad. Make sure you include a water glass and wine glass. Don’t get carried away with the silverware. Just one spoon, one fork, and a knife, if necessary, will do. Top it all off with a cloth napkin. It’s loads classier than a folded paper towel.
Related Posts:
1 Comment »
RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URL
Leave a comment
Additional comments powered by BackType
Good advice on kissing & chocolate!
Comment by Naugty Girl — February 13, 2009 @ 2:56 pm