For three seasons, Big John has been Bret Michaels’ right-hand man on VH1’s Rock of Love. He’s had to break up catfights, console drunks, and try to enforce rules against being too “slutty and whorey.” Good luck with that. Interview by Taya Parker
By Christine Colby
Taya Parker has been a star in our book for a while, but after riding the Rock of Love Bus, she’s garnered a whole new fan base. “I had a 14-year-old boy write me,” she says, “and my first thing back was, ‘Please check with your parents and make sure it’s okay that you’re writing me.’ I’m sure they’re fine with the fact that I’m a VH1 chick, but maybe they don’t know about the other stuff.” Big John Murray is also a fan.
IN THE BEGINNING
Big John began his rock ’n’ roll career with a drunken misstep: After being offered a ride back to his hotel on the tour bus following a Ratt concert in Cleveland, he accidentally got on the crew bus and rode all the way to Detroit before noticing. “We really got along, and I jumped in and helped and kind of took over the security,” John says. “They offered me a position.”
“Who knew making drunken mistakes would change the course of your life? Do you ever wish you hadn’t gotten on the wrong bus?” Taya asks.
“No, I don’t,” he says. “I not only got a career out of this, but I’ve made some very enduring friendships—the girls from the show and the many bands I’ve worked for.” John met Poison when Ratt opened for them in 1999, and went to work for singer Bret Michaels a few years later.
ASS MAN
“I met some diehard Poison fans from Boston, Jen and Mary, and we became true, lifelong friends. Every time they’re around they take pictures of my butt, and I’m like, ‘What are you doing?’ They said they were going to start a website called BigJohnsButt.com. Lo and behold they did!” [Editor’s note: Actually, it’s Myspace.com/BigJohnsButtDotCom.] “See?” Taya complains. “I’m the resident naked girl here, and there aren’t fans of my butt! You have definitely made it in the world if you have a fan club for your butt.”
ROCK OF WILLPOWER
Being in close quarters with the Rock of Love girls seems like it would have huge fringe benefits, but John claims to be immune: “There were a couple of times I walked in and they were topless or whatever, but I’ve seen it all. I’ve been in the business quite a long time. I’m not out there to try to be sexual; I’m out there to look out for Bret’s best interests and mingle with the girls to see who’s real and who’s not. After the Mud Bowl, Farrah and Ashley and a couple other girls took their bras off, and I hosed them down with a fire hose. It doesn’t affect me.
“There have been some weird things that people have offered on the road to try to meet Bret,” John says. “In St. Louis, a lady offered me her 18-year-old daughter for a chance to have something signed by Bret. I was like, you’ve gotta be out of your mind. This is your daughter!”
He isn’t impenetrable, though. He did get together with one of the Rock of Love contestants from season two, Cori. “I dated Cori for a while, once she was eliminated from the show,” John says. “There were never any hard feelings, and Bret was right there behind me. Unfortunately it didn’t work out, and we parted ways.”
A SHOT IN THE DARK
On this season’s premiere episode, one contestant served another a testtube shot of booze from her “cooter,” as Taya puts it. John admits, “That was the most disgusting thing that I have ever seen. After all my years on the road, there is just a line…. I mean, Bret and I were completely in shock.”
“That must have been one of those moments where Bret was like, ‘Okay, maybe I quit. If this is setting the bar for the entire season, I give up,’ ” Taya says with a laugh.
TO BE REAL
“The problem we had was, after two seasons, the girls had seen what worked and what didn’t work,” says John. “One of the things that stands out about Taya, Beverly, and Mindy is they weren’t trying to be anyone else, they were themselves.”
“Thank you for saying that,” Taya says. “I could tell that was weighing on Bret’s mind a lot when he was dealing with me. It was like, ‘You seem too perfect—maybe you’re just a really great actress.’ There were times when I literally wanted to shake him and say, ‘Maybe I’m exactly who I appear to be, and you’re going to miss out because you’re assuming those things!’ ”
SEE YOU IN THE MOVIES
“I obviously want to continue touring with Bret,” John tells us, “but I also want to expand my visibility. One of my dreams is to do horror movies, something like the remake of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, those kind of genre movies. And, because I was in the Marines for so long, I would love to do a military movie. Ironically, the main character in the videogame Gears of War looks identical to me—me with a camouflage bandanna and some dirt on my face. My manager found out they’re in the process of writing the movie, and when the auditions happen, I’m hoping that I can get in there and have them see me, because it literally looks just like me.”
“Also, John has a very cool line of clothes that he wore on the show—Ränghärt clothing,” Taya says. I’ve been fortunate enough to be involved with Christian Audigier. It’s really taken off,” he says. “It’s a partnership. I wear the clothes; I’m the face of the product. Go to BigJohnRocks.com, and there is a link to Ränghärt clothing. I think everyone will love it. It’s a little bit of a high-end deal; we put a little more work into it.”
CELEBREALITY
“There are too many people in the entertainment world who are unapproachable, just because they’re in a movie or on TV,” says John. “I will never think of myself as better than anyone else; I’m just luckier.” Despite his newfound recognition, he doesn’t feel like a celebrity. “It’s surreal. People come up to me, like, ‘Will you sign this? Can we get a picture with you?’ ” he says. “I walk into a restaurant and people go, ‘Oh my God!’ I’m like, ‘Who’s here?’ ” Big John’s here, that’s who.
Taya Parker, 2009 Penthouse Pet of the Year. What rock star wouldn’t want to take her along on his bus?
