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Is it risky to have unprotected oral sex? You betcha!

Q:
I am a big fan of oral sex, particularly fellatio—what guy is not? Can I pick up a venereal disease by getting a blowjob? The thought had never crossed my mind until the last girl I was with insisted on putting a condom on before blowing me. It was a definite turn-off, but it did make me wonder.

A:
Make no mistake: Oral sex can be dangerous. You can potentially pick up most STDs—such as gonorrhea, herpes, hepatitis B, syphilis, chlamydia, chancroid, HPV virus (which is implicated in oral cancers), and HIV—through cunnilingus and fellatio (and, of course, lots of nasty bacteria through analingus).

The giver of oral sex is at greater risk than the receiver, particularly if he or she has had any mouth sores or recent dental work (or has just flossed—so avoid flossing before going down), although potential transmission is bi-directional.

But, as you say, condom use during oral sex is unpopular—only an estimated ten percent or less bother putting on the glove before going down; and the use of the dental dam is even smaller. And even those who know that STDs can be transmitted via oral sex usually do not use protection.

Not surprisingly, people’s main objection is that licking latex is not particularly exciting for either party. And it’s not particularly cool, either. “Hold on, honey, let me get that dental dam ready” is not exactly a turn-on. And then there’s the reduced pleasure and the forethought and planning required. But there are some ways to make safe oral sex more fun.

First of all, it’s important to use the right kind of condom. Avoid the ones coated with spermicidal nonoxynol-9 substances—not only do they taste bitter, but they will give her a numb tongue after a while. Choose an unlubricated latex condom (which can also be cut into a latex barrier if a dental dam is not available).

You can use a female condom, such as Femidom, instead of a dental dam when going down on her, as it has an external sheath that covers the vulva. The female condom can be inserted into the anus and used during analingus instead of or along with a dental dam—a good idea unless you want to end up with a bad case of diarrhea.

Avoid using such food products as whipped cream, chocolate sauce, and other oil-based products on condoms because they break down latex, thus defeating its purpose. But if she likes a hint of flavor, there are plenty of flavored condoms available.

To make it more exciting for both of you, encourage her to put the condom on you with her mouth. If she is reluctant, tell her that by using condoms she avoids the dilemma of whether to spit or swallow and can avoid dealing with the taste issue altogether.

Bottom line: It’s better to be cautious and safe than cool and sorry.

Victoria Zdrok's combination of beauty and intelligence has earned her the label as "sexpert" in many media outlets. She writes a monthly column on love, sex, and dating for Penthouse Magazine entitled "Ask Dr. Z," and a column on sexuality and the law for Penthouse Forum. She is a frequent contributor to several publications and has her own SIRIUS Satellite Radio specialty show, The Sex Connection, on Howard 101. You can find out more about Dr. Z at www.sexysexpert.com