Q:
When you know you’re in love with someone, but you have an attraction to someone else, are you truly in love? Or just denying who you want?
A:
I think you’re in love, sure. I believe it is human nature to be attracted to others, and that will never change. As art lovers, we don’t like only one painting. Why should we be visually stimulated by only one person? The difference is the level of intimacy, trust, and partnership that goes into your chosen relationship. Those are the calling cards of love. Personally, I can’t tell the difference, so I fall in love every day. Ha! But that’s just me; I’m a mess. However, when I was in love in the past, I always found other girls to be attractive, as my wife did with men. We would talk about it and be open with the subject, which is pretty standard stuff in terms of honesty and trust. In fact, I have found that being able to express one’s self in a relationship that freely can bring two people closer, provided neither partner is threatened by the outside interest. Love is love. Attraction is simply a chemical reaction.
I am not a licensed therapist, guru, or magic relationship mender. This is sex and love advice from a guy who has seen both failure and success in the relationship department. I am a little jaded, a little disillusioned, a little sarcastic, yet very honest. Answers may be sincere, absurd, comical, or sometimes flat-out wrong. You'll have to consider the source, I suppose.
