Step 1: See if she’s into chicks
Watch the L word with her or rent Kinsey. Ask if she agrees that women know best how to make love to another woman. If she doesn’t volunteer any lesbian experiences, ask if she’s ever fantasized about it. Or have her leaf through your latest copy of Penthouse and give you her opinion of the Pets. If she’s into watching or reading porn with you, pick a video or book with a hot girl-girl scene and get all excited when that scene is on – you know you can do that! Tell her that you’re imagining her in the scene. If she’s not into porn, wait until you see a hot chick when you are out together and ask her whether she thinks the girl is sexy.
In other words, get her thinking about how hot other women are and then slide in the thought that she might like to make love to another woman.
Make it clear that you have no problem with the idea and you’d never be jealous. But if she has religious or moral objections to lesbian sex, you may have to choose between the girl and the girl-on-girl.
Step 2: Get her in the mood
If she’s adventurous, put a sexual “wish basket” next to your bed and take turns drawing from it and talking about – or fulfilling – each other’s fantasies. Put “watching two women together” in and when it’s drawn, tell her that you’d love to see her with another woman. Or tell her you want to go down on her while she imagines her favorite female icon doing it to her. (For me, it would be Angelina Jolie.) If she agrees, give her the best head of her life.
Step 3: Take small steps
Your girl has to believe that your relationship is on solid ground. Otherwise she’s likely to feel too insecure to bring another woman into the mix. And even if she like the idea of being with another woman, she may be weirded out by the idea of being watched. Get her accustomed to the voyeuristic experience by setting up a mirror in your bedroom or videotaping yourselves together. If she asks what you would do if you watched, say you would either beat off or join in if she approved. Emphasize that you would participate only if she were comfortable with it, since your primary goal is to enhance her pleasure. Convince her that the reason you want to watch her in bed with another woman is so you can learn how to please her better. If she buys this, you’re ready to negotiate terms for a threesome.
Step 4: Negotiate
Okay, I lied. The terms are non-negotiable. She picks the other woman, and she gets to tell you in advance how far you can go (i.e., only watching, only making out with the other woman, only oral sex, or full intercourse but only after your girl has had you first). If she allows only watching, go for it – there’s a good chance she’ll get turned on watching you masturbate and will invite you to join in anyway. Remember, her rules are subject to change at any time, so it may only be a matter of time before you find yourself in a chick sandwich.
Step 5: Make it all bout her
Warning: Triangles are tricky. Don’t expect to be the center of attention – instead, try to make your girl the star of the show. Don’t pay too much attention to the new girl, or you’ll probably lose the old one. And there’s always the risk that your girlfriend will like the new dish so much that she puts you out in the cold…but at least then you’ll have something to brag about with the guys.
